How to Create Balance in Your Life as a Working Woman with CEO, Jenna Anderson
How to Create Balance in Your Life with CEO, Jenna Anderson
Welcome to another episode of “Dream Job with Danielle Cobo”!
Today, I am blessed to be joined by the CEO of Access Elite, Jenna Anderson.
Jenna is the CEO at Access Elite, respected speaker, entrepreneur, wellbeing and telehealth advocate, and Mental Health Champion. Jenna has over 20+ years in corporate America with several of the top Fortune 500 companies.
Jenna talks about how to create balance in your life..
“Live Your Passion and Your Purpose” – Jenna Anderson
Connect with Featured Guest Jenna Anderson:
✳️ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jennifermons/
✳️ Website: https://accesselitenow.com/
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Redefining Self-care in the Workplace
Accessily is a platform as a service health tech company. We work with corporations nationwide to help them optimize their employee well-being, build a positive corporate culture, which now more than ever, is crucial to your success. And I think we've seen that seed change in the market where people are going, “if my employees aren't, well, they don't perform, I don't produce.” And we really go to help transform organizations to be people-centric and to really invest in Employee Self Care.
That is so important, especially now, because we're going into a new phase in the work world where some of us are working virtually from home, some of us are going in to the office, some of us are doing both; and what we've learned through the pandemic is our well-being, our health, our mental and emotional well-being is so important. And if we don't take care of ourselves, if we don't put the oxygen mask on us first, it's really hard to take care of our family or friends and be productive at work.
I think that it all comes down to having the proper expectations and support. What companies haven't realized is that it's not that you need to create this massive programme, it's that you need to have a culture of acknowledgement and space that invests in as little as 20 minutes a day of self-care, and also redefining what self-care is in organizations. Historically, everybody thought that to take care of yourself, you've got to go run a mile or two a day, or it's all about the number of steps you've walked, and that was every programme. Every programme was a Fitbit or a walking programme or a gym subsidy, and I think what we're really trying to convince organizations is yes, fitness is a component. But for some people, self-care is meditating in the morning. It's, you know, learning how to manage stress and anxiety. It's taking an art class. It's learning how to cook. Why are we forcing a definition of self-care versus letting people define what their self-care looks like? I think more and more organizations are saying, hmm, there could be something to that.
It's different for everybody, and it also changes at different points in our life. I know that when my husband was deployed, while I'm used to working out a lot, sleep was more of a priority to me with two year old twins and a husband deployed and working. Sleep was my number one priority, and now that he's back, fitness is coming back into play and so it really speaks to each one of us. It’s unique and different, and it's not a one size fit all, and it's really about customizing and offering resources to your employees that meet their needs and their emotional mental well-being.
I think we as a society are shifting in that direction. There's more knowledge now than ever about the power of sleep, about getting into your REM cycle, and how that allows your body to recharge and reset. If you don't do that you're already starting the day at a disadvantage. You know about how you can eat for energy and for your blood type. There's just so much more knowledge. Now, knowledge is power, and our goal is to help our human beings, our employees, with this knowledge so they can take better care of themselves.
That is so important. And what companies really need to understand, is people don't always stay for the money. I know a lot of people that have left high paying salary jobs because they were burnt out, and it wasn't that they were living to work and not working to live. And I know a lot of people and I know me, myself, had this eye-opening experience to COVID where it was going, is this really what I want to do? You know, it's yes, you can go. But if you're not enjoying your life, what's the point?
In fact, there was a survey recently done, where they asked millennials, which essentially make up 75% of the workforce, to rank what they believed to be most important. And overwhelmingly ahead of religion and pay was well-being. It was the number one most important thing in the job they stay at. I think it's because we want to be well, we want to have a good quality of life. And we don't feel like there's balance if we don't feel valued. If we're not mentally well, because we're either depressed, or stressed out, or not feeling valued, we're not going to stay; and you're seeing people switching jobs because they are being forced to come back to the office where they actually like working from home. So more and more companies are evaluating that now, and saying, do we want to keep talented people here? Well, let's take better care of them, and that doesn't just mean in dollars.
Breaking Stereotypes
First of all, millennials, they're at a different age range. Now, do you really think about where the millennials are? A lot of the millennials are having kids. They are they're working full time, and they're really getting their career up and going, or they have their career and they're having kids. This is now that we call the future core of where our society is and where the generations are, and you really just take a step back and think about something. When it comes to millennials, we saw our parents go through this shift where mom and dad were working, and yet they were still being held that same kind of old society mentality where women were doing most of stuff at home, and now entering the workforce, and so what we saw was, our moms getting burnt out; and we experienced that, we witnessed it, we watched it. And so I'm assuming that's probably why, when we start to enter the workforce and we start to have families, why this is so important to us.
I think we were told really bad stories. I share the story all the time, when I was mid 20s, starting off at the big corporations trying to make my way up the executive ladder, and I had a well-meaning boss say to me, “Jenna, you can either be an executive or you can be a mom, but you can't have both.” And I remember breathing that in and thinking to myself, wow, he really believes that and that was incredibly motivating to me. I also think the majority of the role models I did see at that time that were executive women didn't have kids. And you're seeing more and more of that mold kind of break as women are moving up the ranks, and they do have children. I have three amazing daughters under five, and whenever I say that to people, they go wow, with this error. Whereas being a mom has made me an incredibly better worker, it's made me a better leader, it's made me a better executive, a better peer. My father put it best and he goes, “Becoming a mom will make you value your time more than you ever did before, because you have something worth valuing it for.” So it makes you more effective, it makes you more efficient. But I think it comes down to society rethinking what is the working family look like, you know, what is that balance structure between man and woman or partners that are raising children? What does that look like? And giving space for people to have both. There is a chance I'm working from home that my three year old or one and a half year old are going to run in here and decide to join the meeting. As that Team Member told me when my first daughter was born, I changed a diaper while leaving a meeting in the conference room because I was breastfeeding, and I took her to work, and incumbent upon us as parents to lead by example for the younger generation and show them that it's okay to change a diaper leading a meeting. It’s okay to say that my kid is sick, and I'm not gonna be able to join that meeting. And if you don't lead by example, and set those standards, then others won't do it for you, and that is a hugely important thing for me.
Leading by Example and Honoring Boundaries
Leading by example is so important. I remember when I was working for a company, they were talking about work life balance, but they weren't – the leadership team weren't setting the example. And so one of the things that I did with my team was, if I wanted them to shut down at a certain hour – you know, we weren't in an industry where everything was an emergency – so I encourage them to shut down between certain hours, and I needed to do the same. And I needed to be respectful and honor their time. So one of the things I did was if I was working late at night, that was on me. So I did it when I was doing overnights and travel. So I would delay delivery of the email to the next morning so that they're not getting dinged at night. Because what that telling to our team members or employees is, well, if she's working, I should be working.
It was eye-opening to me. I had an employee once told me, I don't feel comfortable taking a lunch, and I was like, kind of taken back. I'm like, why don’t you feel comfortable taking lunch? You should take a lunch, you should go outside, you go for a walk. And she said, well, you don't take lunch. I work through lunch, because to me, I can get done earlier, and then I have more time with my kids. But I realized the example I was setting was I expected it without saying it. Other people assumed that it wasn't okay to take a lunch. And I think even if you either change a behavior or just open a conversation, like, Hey, I really want you to take the lunch, I value that break for you. I think you perform better when you do it. I may not get up and eat my lunch away. But I take a 15 minute break to meditate or I take breaks between meetings, and that works well for me. But giving the space to do that, because I think sometimes people don't realize your behaviour gets mimicked or viewed as an expectation.
And it almost brings me to the idea of setting expectations as a leader and opening that space for communication as people grow. There's been a lot of change over the past year in culture, and I get questions all the time, like how do you keep a culture where part of culture is the watercooler talk. It's the conference that you form with people where you get to know them on a personal level, and as a company focused on culture, we're continually Guinea pigging ideas, trying to figure out how do you create a positive culture. And one of the things that we did that I think has worked incredibly well and we've done things that haven't worked well. We started this programme called photo of the week where we ask employees to put a photo on our Slack channel of them, just living their lives whether it's going to the zoo or having lunch or riding a bike, so you can get a peek into somebody's personal life. And it gives you so much perspective on who they are outside of work, which allows you to look at them through a different lens in the workplace, and I continually ask people to get to know people on a personal level because it will change how you productively work with them.
You get to build deeper relationships with people when you get to know what I would say like what's the why, why does that person wake up every single morning and show up at work and show up at life? It's because whether they're passionate about travelling, or they're they've got family or they enjoy different hobbies, what's their why because it's another level to connect with them on.
Recognizing Your “Why” and Overcoming Limiting Beliefs
We can all go back to Simon Sinek because he has redefined the Why. You gotta love it. But the Why is something that we didn't think about, like we do now. So what's the why behind the task? What's the why behind why I get up? Why am I here? What is my purpose? One of my favourite things that I ask people in a job interview is, what is your superhero skill? Why are you here? What's your superhero skill? So you can get a feel for somebody like how they view themselves and what they bring to the workplace, which is so aligned oftentimes with their purpose and passion.
We all have these preconceived beliefs of our own self-worth of where we are and what we can accomplish. I'm absolutely no different going into my career, I truly believe that every time I had a child, or built my family - which is the most important thing in my world - that somehow it was going to be a step back in my career. I almost anticipated that. My husband would say, before I had my first child, I was running 150 miles an hour trying to take every opportunity go on every trip, because if I have a kid, I'm not gonna be able to do this.
Ironically I couldn't have been more wrong. And every point in my career that I can look back on where I've had a major success or a major promotion, it's been when I've been pregnant. My first SVP role was offered to me when I was pregnant with my first daughter, and I went from managing 10 employees to managing 70 employees overnight while six months pregnant, and it works. You just figure it out; as almost anybody can tell you, when things feel daunting, how do you eat an elephant one bite at a time? You take a step forward, you say yes, and you move on.
My second time I was pregnant, I started my own company, and literally went from zero to making the most money I'd made in a year while pregnant with my daughter and candidly breastfeeding in one arm and typing out proposals on the other, and yeah, it was crazy. I look back on it now, and I think, how did I have the energy to do that? But you just get up every morning, and you figure it out.
The third major opportunity was my first CEO role, which was offered to me by the board when I was four months pregnant with my youngest child. I remember coming home, my husband goes, why don't you take all these crazy opportunities when you're pregnant? I think sometimes life has a way of showing you what you're capable of, even when you don't know what you're capable of. I tell that to everyone. When things seem daunting, or you don't think you’re prepared, or if you're willing to learn, if you're hungry to ask for help and try new things, you're going to figure it out. And you kind of have to take that leap of faith and trust in your own ability that this is your plan and your path. And as my mentor has said to me, and every time I get stressed I tell myself and it's kind of like my mantra, you're right where you're supposed to be. This is your path, and everything you've done until this point is to get you to where you're going. As long as you believe that it always works out to take that stress off of trying to be something you don't think you are or trying to do something you don't think you're capable of.
Realizing Your Value and Achieving Work-Life Balance
I really encourage people that if a family is in the cards for you do it, I think you have to wait or it's not the right time, it will never be the right time when it comes to family. Every day, whenever you do it, it will be equally crazy, and the biggest thing I look at now is I went from the stage of my life of how do I create this family and manage work, to the stage I'm in right now, which is how do I have a family and also take care of myself, which is kind of like the next shift in my paradigm of valuing myself, my worth, and my time.
The other things that I look at is one, decide what your value is. Sometimes people are number people, I watch this amazing podcast on understanding your hourly rate. So I know what my hourly rate is, I know what my value is, and then I look at everything else in my life. I'm like, is this worth my hourly rate? Can I outsource it at a much lower cost, so that I can deploy my efforts and my hourly rate in the right direction? Like spending time with my kids is priceless, that will always trump everything else. But that means that hey, maybe my husband, I don't know the lawn, maybe that's something that we outsource in our life because it gives us more time. I'm not going to have an expectation that I'm going to cook seven nights a week. It doesn't work into my schedule, and I think letting go of that expectation that I'm not less of a mom or less of a wife because I can't work full time and be a great mom and cook dinner seven nights a week. I think whether we admit it or not, there's this preconceived notion that like, oh, if you don't cook, clean, 10 for your kids work full time, I won't be a great wife or partner, then somehow you're not good enough. The CEO of a very large computer company, she put it very eloquently, “We all have a boat, and you can only have four things on your boat. You have to pick what those four things are, and what's on the boat at that time may change in six months.” But decide the four things on your boat, your family, your job, cooking may not be one of the things on my boat. So I always visualize what's on my boat right now, and I'm okay, putting aside things that don't fit on my boat. And taking care of yourself should never go off your boat. I think oftentimes, it's the first thing that people take off their boat, they go off care of myself next month or next year, and then you all of a sudden wake up and you're like, why am I unhappy? I'm like, well, maybe I'm unhappy because I haven't taken a bath and like sat in the bathtub for half an hour and a year, or I haven't been able to like go for a walk without hearing Mommy, which I love hearing. Sometimes you want to go for a walk without hearing mommy, and the stage in life I'm in right now, and really what we even work on the company side is really prioritizing self-care every single day, and with my girlfriends and my friends, I always say I'm like, what did you do for yourself today? It doesn't have to be an hour but like, what did you do for yourself and it may be learning and prioritizing a new career and taking a bath like my favorite thing to do now. It may be going for a walk or meditating. But doing those things makes you better at all other aspects of your life. Again, it always goes back to you have to take care of yourself first before you can take care of others.
And it's so good because it gives you a chance to recharge. And when you recharge, you value life in a different lens. Like you can take a look at those little moments and go, “Oh my gosh, my baby is screaming right now. But she's so cute, and I love it so much” versus, “Oh my God, my baby's screaming right now and I can't take it anymore.” And I think acknowledging like, where's my box? What is my capacity and ensuring I don't get to 100% capacity? I think historically, I was like, Oh, it's okay, I should be at 100% capacity; I'm only performing well when I'm at 100% capacity. And my mindset now is I should never be above 75% capacity. And if I am doing it wrong, I need to reevaluate that because I'm not at my best when I'm above that.
Also being compassionate with yourself too, when it comes to sometimes you're going to be a great mom and not so great at work; and sometimes you're gonna be great at work and maybe stressed out at home. You've got to be compassionate with yourself that you can't be everything to everybody. Because the times that maybe you're not as connected at work, there's other days that you're going to over perform those days, and vice versa.
Redefining “Great”
I even look at it now a little differently. I'm like, it's not even about being great. It's about redefining great. So, hey, working all day, and maybe not getting out of my pajamas because I have so much going on, and that's okay, I'm not going to look at myself and say, you fell short today. Or hey, I didn't make it to this aspect of my kids playdates because they all seem to want to be scheduled before three o'clock. It doesn't make me less of a mom, I'm still a great mom. I think as society and as people and humans, we all need to rethink the expectations we have put on ourselves. I'm a high achiever. I'm always gonna give 100% at life, and I know that myself. So to your point, give yourself a chance to redefine what is great. If I get through a day, my kids are happy and healthy, my job and my employees are feeling valued, and we're doing good things for our clients, that is a great day. And it doesn't mean that I get everything in my to-do list done. It doesn't mean that I didn't yell at my kids. Although I'd like to do. It doesn't always happen. But that's okay, that's a great day. I really think in general, people need to redefine their expectations of great and just say, look, are you happy? Are you healthy? Are the people around you feeling valued? Are you doing good by your clients, your customers, your peers, and you did great. Let's move forward.
I think social media culture only shows you the beauty and all aspects of life. We post children and totally clean outfits, the mom working on the getaway in her matched coffee mug. Now, it really does showcase the perfect aspects or the non-messy, which I would even say perfect and non-messy aspects. You know, that doesn't happen. My kids walk out the house with stains on their clothes, their hair, even though I brush it, it never looks properly. I have stains all over my clothes at any given moment from somebody wiping their nose or touching something that they shouldn't have touched. You know, life is messy, but those moments are beautiful too. And it's almost like you only see the perfectly groomed moments and you assume somehow your life is less now and it's even like causing me to want to show more of the messy moments that are the moments to say, “Hey, this is life. This is how it looks behind the scenes even though that's not what you would see normally within social media.”
It's easy to fall into that trap of, “Well, their life looks great. How are they doing it? They've got such a perfect life.” I don't get it and it's like, you don't see that stuff at home. You know, you don't see the laundry pile of mess in the house. I think even those people are thinking about, okay, well, how do I do this? My life is chaotic, you know? How do I move up in my career? How do I become the person I think I'm destined to become in the workforce, when I have a life of messy kids and crazy expectations? I think it's to your point, that's okay, that is part of it, almost every person behind the screen, behind the filter, zoom backgrounds are bedroom or laundry on their couch, or if you're my kids, then throwing themselves against the door dramatically because somebody stole one of their candies or toys. That's part of life. We should, as a society, embrace that. And if a company isn't going to embrace who you are, and the expectations that you have, they're probably not the right company to work for.
Tips on How to Create Balance and Live Life to the Fullest
Have the belief that you are capable, and you're exactly where you're supposed to be in life.
Push aside all of those preconceived notions, all of the fear and doubt, and live with confidence that you are capable and you are deserving of everything that you receive. Because I think once you get to that place, everything else will be so much easier.
Own the mess, be excited about the mess.
It’s part of your life, it's beautiful. I joke all the time and say, I live in organized chaos. I wouldn't have it any other way. So don't feel like you need to hide who you are, to be something that you're not.
Live your passion, your purpose.
If you're not doing it currently, find something where you can. If you are passionate about what you do every day, it won't feel like work. It doesn't mean you won't have a hard day or you won't be doing menial tasks you feel are beneath you. But it'll feel good, and when it feels good, you will be the best version of yourself. If that isn't where you are right now, then you're not where you're supposed to be.
And those are, what I live my life by, and I've been lucky enough that at any point in my career where I didn't feel valued, where it wasn't meshing with my purpose, I found something new to do and I wouldn't look back on that.
Danielle Cobo
Hey beautiful, Welcome to dream job with Danielle Cobo Podcast. I am Danielle Cobo, elite career coach, and I believe every woman has the power to step into their dream jobs, earn the salary they are worth, and live the life they desire. Each week you join me you're going to hear from these inspiring women who have overcome adversities and levels up their career. You're going to learn how to eliminate that inner critic that is holding you back from pursuing your dream, how to feel confident, create healthy boundaries, to transition burnout to re-energize and gain clarity on how to accelerate your career. It's never too late to pursue your dream job. The time is now. Are you ready? Hey, everyone. It's Danielle Cobo, and welcome to another episode of dream job with Danielle Cobo, I have an incredible guest today. She is Jenna Anderson, and she is the CEO of Access Elite. She's a speaker. She's an entrepreneur, and she's a mental health champion. Thank you so much for joining us today, Jenna.
Jenna Anderson
Hi, Danielle. I'm so happy to be here. It's such an exciting opportunity to talk about your dream job, opportunities, and rate limiting beliefs. So, looking forward to the opportunity.
Danielle Cobo
Well, you definitely have had a very successful career with a lot of changes over your career and some really pivotal moments where you've said yes to things, and so right now I first want to start with what the company that you work for is a really unique company. Tell us a little bit about what is Accessily?
Jenna Anderson
Yeah, Accessily is a platform as a service health tech company. We work with corporations nationwide to help them optimize their employee well-being, build a positive corporate culture, which now more than ever, is crucial to your success, and I think we've seen that seed change in the market where people are going, if my employees aren't, well, they don't perform, I don't produce, and we really go in help transform organisations to be people centric, and to really invest in Employee Self Care.
Danielle Cobo
That is so important, especially now, because we're going into a new phase in the work world where some of us are working virtually from home, some of us are going in to the office, some of us are doing both, and what we've learned through the pandemic is our well-being, our health, our mental and emotional well-being is so important, and if we don't take care of ourselves, I know my listeners have heard this before. If we don't put the oxygen mask on us first, it's really hard to take care of our family, our friends and be productive at work.
Jenna Anderson
Oh, 100%, and I think that it all comes down to having the proper expectations and support. What companies haven't realised is that it's not I need to create this massive programme, it's that you need to have a culture of acknowledgement and space that invests in as little as 20 minutes a day of self-care, and also redefining what self-care is in organisations. I mean, historically, everybody thought, you're taking care of yourself, you've got to go run a mile or two a day, or it's all about the number of steps you've walked, and that was every programme. Every programme was a Fitbit or a walking programme or a gym subsidy, and I think what we're really trying to convince organisations is yes, fitness is a component, but for some people self-care is meditating in the morning. It's, you know, learning how to manage stress and anxiety. It's taking an art class, it's learning how to cook, why are we forcing a definition of self-care versus letting people define what their self-care looks like? I think more and more organisations are saying, hmm, there could be something to that.
Danielle Cobo
Absolutely, in our in our self-care, like you said, it's different for everybody, and it also changes at different points in our life. I know that when my husband was deployed, while I'm used to working out a lot, sleep was more of a priority to me with two year old twins and a husband deployed and working like sleep was my number one priority, and now that he's back, fitness is coming back into play, and so it really speaks to each one of us is unique and different, and it's not a one size fit all, and it's really about customizing and offering resources to your employees that meet their needs and their emotional mental well-being.
Jenna Anderson
100%, and I think we as a society are shifting in that direction. There's more knowledge now than ever about the power of Sleep, about getting into your REM cycle and how that allows your body to recharge and reset. If you don't do that you're already starting the day at a disadvantage. You know about how you can eat for energy and for your blood type. There's just so much more knowledge. Now, knowledge is power, and our goal is to help our human beings employees with this knowledge so they can take better care of themselves.
Danielle Cobo
Yeah, absolutely. That is so important, and what companies really need to understand, is people don't always stay for the money. I know a lot of people that have left high paying salary jobs, because they were burnt out, and it wasn't they were living to work and not working to live, and I know a lot of people and I know me, myself had this eye opening experience to COVID where it was going, is this really what I want to do? You know, it's yes, you can go. But if you're not enjoying your life, what's the point?
Jenna Anderson
I mean, Daniel, you just hit the nail on the head. In fact, there was a survey recently done, where they asked millennials, which essentially make up 75% of the workforce, two rank, what they believed to be most important, and overwhelmingly ahead of religion, and pay was well-being. It was the number one most important thing in the job they select in the job they stay at, and I think it's because we want to be well, we want to have a good quality of life. If we don't feel like there's balance if we don't feel valued. If we're not mentally well, because we're either depressed or stressed out or not feeling valued. We're not going to stay, and you're seeing people switching jobs, because they are being forced to come back to the office where they actually like working from home. So more and more companies are evaluating that now, and saying, like, keep talented people here? Well, let's taking better care of them, and that doesn't just mean in dollars.
Danielle Cobo
Yeah, let's talk about millennials for a second because I know millennials have a bad rap, and I want my listeners to really understand something and really think about why this is so important to millennials. First of all, millennials, they're at a different age range. Now, do you really think about where the millennials are? A lot of the millennials are having kids. They are they're working full time, and they're really getting their career up and going, or they have their career and they're having kids. This is now that we call the future core of where our society is and where the generations are, and you really just take a step back and think about something. When it comes to millennials, we saw our parents go through this shift where mom and dad were working, and yet they were still being held that same kind of old society mentality where women were doing most of stuff at home, and now entering the workforce, and so what we saw was, our moms getting burnt out, you know, and we experienced that we witnessed it, we watched it, and so I'm assuming that's probably why, when we start to enter the workforce, and we start to have families why this is so important to us.
Jenna Anderson
Well, that I think we were told really bad stories. I share the story all the time, when I was mid 20s, starting off at the big corporations trying to make my way up the executive ladder, and I had a well-meaning boss, say to me, Jenna, you can either be an executive or you can be a mom, but you can't have both, and I remember, like breathing that in and thinking to myself, wow, he really believes that and that was incredibly motivating to me. I also think the majority of the role models, I did see at that time that were executive women didn't have kids, and you're seeing more and more of that mould kind of break as women are moving up the ranks, and they do have children. I have three amazing daughters under five, and whenever I say that to people, they go wow, with this error. Whereas being a mom has made me an incredibly better worker, it's made me a better leader, it's made me a better executive, a better peer. My father put it best he goes becoming a mom will make you value your time more than you ever did before, because you have something worth valuing it for. So it makes you more effective, it makes you more efficient. But I think it comes down to society rethinking what is the working family look like, you know, what is that balance structure between man and woman or partners that are raising children? What does that look like? And giving space for people to have both. There is a chance I'm working from home that my three year old or one and a half year old are going to run in here and decide to join the meeting. I have to mute or that I'm going to have to as that Team Member told me when my first daughter was born, I changed a diaper while leaving a meeting in the conference room because I was breastfeeding, and I took her to work, and incumbent upon us as parents to lead by example for the younger generation and show them that it's okay to change a diaper leading a meeting. It’s okay to say what, my kid is sick, and I'm not gonna be able to join that meeting, and if you don't lead by example, and set those standards, then others won't do it for you, and that is a hugely important thing for me.
Danielle Cobo
Absolutely, leading by example is so important, because I remember you were saying, you can either be that person told you, you can either be in a high level executive position or be a mom, and I remember when I was working for a company, they were talking about work life balance, but they weren't. The leadership team weren't setting the example, and so one of the things that I did with my team was, if I wanted them to shut down at a certain hour, you know, we weren't, we weren't in an industry where everything was an emergency. So, if I wanted my team encourage them to shut down between certain hours, and I needed to do the same, and I needed to be respectful and honour their time, so one of the things I did was if I was working late at night, that was that was on me. So I did it when I was doing overnights and travel. So I would delayed delivery of the email to the next morning so that they're not getting dinged at night. Because what that telling to our team members or employees is, well, if she's working, I should be working. There's we as leaders need to set that.
Jenna Anderson
100%. It was eye opening to me, I had an employee once told me, I don't feel comfortable taking a lunch, and I was like, kind of taken back. I'm like, what do you feel comfortable taking lunch? You should take a lunch, you should go outside, you go for a walk, and she said, well, you don't take them lunch. I work through lunch, because to me, I can get done earlier, and then I have more time with my kids. But I realised the example I was setting was I expected without saying it. Other people assumed that it wasn't okay to take a lunch, and I think to your point, Daniel, even if you either change a behaviour, or just open a conversation, like, Hey, I really want you to take the lunch, I value that break for you. I think you perform better when you do it. I may not get up and eat my lunch away. But I take a 15 minute break to meditate or I take breaks between meetings, and that works well for me. But giving the space to do that, because I think sometimes people don't realise your behaviour gets mimicked or viewed as an expectation.
Danielle Cobo
It does. It absolutely does, and if we want to encourage our team to do something, we need to, like you said, open up that conversation or do it ourselves. Because they're going to do whatever we do sometimes.
Jenna Anderson
Absolutely, and it almost brings me to the idea of setting expectations as a leader and opening that space for communication as people grow. There's been a lot of change over the past year in culture, and I get questions all the time, like how do you keep a culture where part of culture is the watercooler talk. It's the conference that you form with people where you get to know them on a personal level, and as a company focused on culture, we're continually Guinea pigging ideas, trying to figure out how do you create a positive culture, and one of the things that we did that I think has worked incredibly well and we've done things that haven't worked well. We started this programme called photo of the week where we ask employees to put a photo on our Slack channel of them, just living their lives whether it's going to the zoo or having lunch or riding a bike, so you can get a peek into somebody's personal life, and it gives you so much perspective on who they are outside of work, which allows you to look at them through a different lens in the workplace, and I continually ask people to get to know people on a personal level because it will change how you productively work with them.
Danielle Cobo
Absolutely, you get to build deeper relationships with people when you get to know what I would say like what's the why, why does that person wake up every single morning and show up at work and show up at life? It's because whether they're passionate about travelling, or they're they've got family or they enjoy different hobbies, what's their why because it's another level to connect with them on.
Jenna Anderson
100%, and we can all go back to Simon Sinek because he has redefined the Why. You gotta love it. But the Why is something that we didn't think about, like we do now. So what's the why behind the task? What's the why behind why I get up? Why am I here? What is my purpose? Daniel, you do a great job and talking about purpose and why people are doing things and what their passions are. One of my favourite things that I ask people in a job interview is, what is your superhero skill? Why are you here? What's your superhero skill? So you can get a feel for somebody like how they view themselves and what they bring to the workplace, which is so aligned oftentimes with their purpose and passion.
Danielle Cobo
Yep, absolutely. That's a fun question to ask, too. You get to really hear their personality, and it kind of lightens up the mood of an interview, because interviews can be very stressful to go through.
Jenna Anderson
Absolutely.
Danielle Cobo
So let's talk a little bit. I know you and I have talked about this, but I really want my listeners to hear this, because this is very powerful, and a lot of times my listeners will say, well hear me say talk about limiting beliefs and, and these inner critics that we have about ourselves, and whether it's something that somebody has told us or something we've told ourselves as to something we can't do. It's these negative thoughts that really hold us back from living the life that we want, and so one of them, I don't even want to spoil it, I want you to share your story as to how you became a successful CEO, and a mom of three kids under five.
Jenna Anderson
Yeah, we all have these preconceived beliefs of our own self-worth of where we are and what we can accomplish. I'm absolutely no different going into my career, I truly believe that every time I had a child, or built my family, which is the most important thing in my world that somehow it was going to be a step back in my career. I almost anticipated that. My husband would say, like, before I had my first child, I was running 150 miles an hour trying to take every opportunity go on every trip, because I was like, I have a kid, I'm not gonna be able to do this.
Danielle Cobo
Yeah.
Jenna Anderson
Ironically I couldn't have been more wrong, and every point in my career that I can look back on where I've had a major success or a major promotion. It's been when I've been pregnant. My first SVP role was offered to me when I was pregnant with my first daughter, and I went from managing 10 employees to managing 70 employees overnight while six months pregnant, and it works. You just figure it out, as almost anybody can tell you, when things feel daunting, it's like, how do you eat an elephant one bite at a time, you take a step forward, you say yes, and you move on. My second time I was pregnant, I started my own company, and literally went from zero to making the most money I'd made in a year while pregnant with my daughter, and candidly, breastfeeding in one arm and typing out proposals on the other, and yeah, it was crazy. I look back on it now, and I think, how did I have the energy to do that, but you just do and get up every morning, and you figure it out. The third major opportunity was my first CEO role, which was offered to me by the board when I was four months pregnant with my youngest child. I remember coming home, my husband goes, why don't you take all these crazy opportunities when you're pregnant? I think sometimes life has a way of showing you what you're capable of, even when you don't know what you're capable of. I tell that to everyone. When things seem daunting, or you don't think I'm prepared, or if you're willing to learn, if you're hungry, to ask for help and try new things, you're going to figure it out, and you kind of have to take that leap of faith and trust in your own ability that this is your plan and your path, and as my mentor has said to me, and I remember this, every time I get stressed is I tell myself, it's kind of like my mantra, like you're right where you're supposed to be. This is your path, and everything you've done till this point is to get you to where you're going. As long as you believe that it always works out like to take that stress off of trying to be something you don't think you are or trying to do something you don't think you're capable of. I really encourage people that if a family is in the cards for you do it.
Danielle Cobo
Oh, yeah.
Jenna Anderson
I think that like you have to wait or it's not the right time, it will never be the right time to family. Every day, whenever you do it, it will be equally crazy, and the biggest thing I look at now is I went from the stage of my life of how do I create this family and manage work to the stage I'm in right now, which is how do I have a family and also take care of myself, which is kind of like the next shift in my paradigm of valuing myself, my worth, and my time.
Danielle Cobo
Absolutely, and you talk about Just taking it one day at a time, because I can relate a lot to this because first off before I had kids, I was travelling Monday to Thursday by plane and I was working all the time, and I was looking at my team going, how do you guys have kids and work? I couldn't comprehend it. If you guys are listening out there, and you're wondering the same thing, like Jenna and I are talking about. You actually learn better time management. You learn to be intentional with your time. Actually a better balance in my life after kids than I did before kids, which sounds counterintuitive, but I do. I remember times my life when I know that when my husband told me that he was going to be deployed, and I'm going to have to quit my used to think like, I'm gonna have to quit my job, how am I going to have kids and him deployed, and overnight travels. I remember being in tears like I'm going to quit my dream job. This is the job that I loved, and you just take it one day at a time, you put one foot in, and you get creative, like there's times where I flew my parents out to help for one week, my in-laws help for another week, and you get creative, and you get compassionate with yourself. You celebrate and appreciate that those are the types of grandparents get one on one time with your kids. So I love your advice of Just say yes to things, go for it, take it one day at a time, because it's absolutely true.
Jenna Anderson
Well, and I think you also kind of lead into the other things that I look at is one decide what your value is, I now know, I have a joke. Sometimes people are number people, I watch this amazing podcast on understanding your hourly rate. So I know what my hourly rate is, I know what my value is, and then I look at everything else in my life. I'm like, is this worth my hourly rate? Can I outsource it at a much lower cost, so that I can deploy my efforts and my hourly rate in the right direction, like spending time with my kids is priceless, that will always Trump everything else. But that means that hey, maybe my husband, I don't know the lawn, maybe that's something that we outsource in our life because it gives us more time, I'm not going to have an expectation that I'm going to cook seven nights a week. It doesn't work into my schedule, and I think letting go of that expectation that I'm not less of a mom or less of a wife because I can't work full time and be a great mom and cook dinner seven nights a week. I think whether we admit it or not, there's this preconceived notion that like, oh, if you don't cook, clean, 10 for your kids work full time, I won't be a great wife or partner, then somehow you're not good enough. The CEO of oh, my gosh, and I'm gonna blank on it. It's a very large computer company, I listen to his talk from her. She put it very eloquently, and it uses visual all the time now, where she's like, we all have a boat, and you can only have four things on your boat. You have to pick what those four things are, and what's on the boat at that time may change in six months. But decide the four things on your boat, your family, your job, cooking may not be one of the things on my boat. So I always visualize what's on my boat right now, and I'm okay, putting aside things that don't fit on my boat, and taking care of yourself should never go off your boat. I think oftentimes, it's the first thing that people take off their boat, they go off care of myself next month or next year, and then you all of a sudden wake up and you're like, why am I unhappy? I'm like, well, maybe I'm unhappy because I haven't taken a bath and like sat in the bathtub for half an hour and a year, or I haven't been able to like go for a walk without hearing Mommy, which I love hearing. Sometimes you want to go for a walk without hearing mommy, and the stage in life I'm in right now, and really what we even work on the company side is really prioritizing self-care every single day, and with my girlfriends and my friends, I always say I'm like, What did you do for yourself today? It doesn't have to be an hour but like, what did you do for yourself and it may be learning and prioritizing a new career and taking a bath like my favourite thing to do now. It may be going for a walk or meditating. But doing those things makes you better at all other aspects of your life.
Danielle Cobo
100% .Again, it always goes back to you have to take care of yourself first then you before you can other and I can relate to that. Yes, I love being a mommy. I remember looking at my husband one day going, can I just have a minute where I don't be needed? And he's like, what? Like, yeah, you wake up, you take care of kids. Then when you're leading a team, you've got customers reaching out to you're putting fires out here, and then you go home and it's kids and then all of a sudden, you look at me and go Hey, honey, you're going I just need a minute to not be needed. So my self-care thing is my nothing box.
Jenna Anderson
Yeah.
Danielle Cobo
I sit in a room for just 10 minutes and just sit in my nothing box.
Jenna Anderson
But it's so good because it gives you a chance to recharge, and you recharge, you value life in a different lens. Like you can take a look at those little moments and go, oh, my gosh, my baby is screaming right now. But she's so cute, and I love so much versus Oh my God, my baby's screaming right now and I can't take it anymore, and I think acknowledging like, Where's my box? What is my capacity and ensuring I don't get to 100% capacity? I think historically, I was like, Oh, it's okay, I should be at 100% capacity, I'm only performing well, but I'm at 100% capacity, and my mindset now is I should never be above 75% capacity, and if what am I doing wrong, I need to reevaluate that because I'm not at my best when I'm above that.
Danielle Cobo
Also being compassionate with yourself too, when it comes to sometimes you're going to be a great mom, and not so great at work, and sometimes you're gonna be great at work and maybe stressed out at home. It just, you've got to be compassionate with yourself that you can't be everything to everybody. You can't be doing everything that everybody and its okay. Because the times that maybe you're not as connected at work, there's other days that you're going to over perform those days, and vice versa.
Jenna Anderson
Oh, 100%. I even look at it now a little differently. I'm like, it's not even about being great. It's about like, redefining great. So, hey, working all day, and maybe not getting out of my pajamas because I have so much going on, and that's okay, I'm not going to look at myself and say, you fell short today, Or hey, I didn't make it to this aspect of my kids playdates because they all seem to want to be scheduled before three o'clock. It doesn't make me less of a mom, I'm still a great mom. I think as society and as people and humans, we all need to rethink like, the expectations we have put on ourselves. I'm a high achiever. I'm always gonna give 100% at life, and I know that myself. So to your point, give yourself some great, redefine what is great. If I get through a day, my kids are happy and healthy, my job, and my employees are feeling valued, and we're doing good things for our clients, that is a great day, and it doesn't mean that I get everything to do list done. It doesn't mean that I didn't yell at my kids. Although I'd like to do. It doesn't always happen. But that's okay. That's a great day, and I really think in general, people need to redefine their expectations of great and just say, look, are you happy? Are you healthy? Are the people around you feeling valued? Are you doing good by your clients, your customers, your peers, and you did great. Let's move forward.
Danielle Cobo
That mind shift to that to do list is always going to be there, you're never going to get beyond that to do list. I 100% agree with that, and you said something really powerful. There's times that we don't want to yell at her kids. We've all been there, and be compassionate yourself. Because here's what I say to myself is. If I yell at my kids, and I go, this is not the person I want to be right now. This isn't the mom, I want to be right now. I get to celebrate that. It’s opening my eyes that I need to take some self-care, I need to take a step back, take some breathing moments, and not get hard on yourself for it. Because it's so easy to be hard on yourself for it instead of saying, I get to celebrate that this is opening my eyes to do something different.
Jenna Anderson
Oh, my gosh. Yeah, I think social media culture only shows you the beauty and all aspects of life. We post children and totally clean outfits, the mom working on the getaway in her matched coffee mug. Now, it really does showcase the perfect aspects of or the non messy, which I would even say a perfect the non messy aspects. You know, that doesn't happen. My kids walk out the house with stains on their clothes, their hair even though I brush it never looks properly. I have stains all over my clothes at any given moment from somebody wiping their nose or touching something that they shouldn't have touch. You know, life is messy. But those moments are beautiful too, and it's almost like you only see the perfectly groomed moments and you assume somehow Your life is less now and it's even like causing me to want to show more of the messy moments that are the moments to say, Hey, this is life. This is how it looks behind the scenes even though that's not what you would see normally within social media.
Danielle Cobo
Yeah, it's so true because it's easy to fall into that trap of. Well, their life looks how are they doing it? How are they doing it? They've got such a perfect life. I don't get it and it's like, you don't see that stuff at home. You know, you don't see the laundry pile of mess in the house. You know, the fact that this morning my kids were sitting on my lap while I was doing my makeup and singing too. I don't know Justin Timberlake, trolls. I mean, you just have those moments and they're messy, but they're fun and it's just a part of life.
Jenna Anderson
It is. I think even those people are thinking about, okay, well, how do I do this? My life is chaotic, you know? How do I move up in my career? How do I become the person I think I'm destined to become in the workforce, when I have a life of messy kids and crazy expectations? I think it's to your point, that's okay, that is part of it, almost every person behind the screen, you know, behind the filter, zoom backgrounds, bedroom or laundry on their couch, or if you're my kids, then throwing themselves against the door dramatically because somebody stole one of their candies or toys. That's part of life. We should, as a society, embrace that, and then that company isn't going to embrace who you are, and the expectations that you have, they're probably not the right company to work for.
Danielle Cobo
Oh, yes, I agree. 100%. So, as wrapping up our time here today, which I could probably talk to you for hours, because you're just amazing, and what are three takeaways that you really want our listeners and our audience to hear? What are some three things that you want them to hear, really resonate with?
Jenna Anderson
Yeah, I would say the first thing is, have the belief that you are capable, and you're exactly where you're supposed to be in life. So push aside all of those preconceived notions, all of the fear and doubt, and live with confidence that you are capable, and you are deserving of everything that you receive. Because I think once you get to that place, everything else will be so much easier. The second thing is, own the mess, excited about the mess, it’s part of your life, it's beautiful. I joke all the time. I live in organized chaos. I wouldn't have it any other way. So don't feel like you need to hide who you are, to be something that you're not. The third thing would be live your passion, your purpose. If you're not doing it currently, find something where you can. If you are passionate about what you do every day, it won't feel like work. It doesn't mean you won't have a hard day or you won't be doing menial tasks you feel are beneath you. But it'll feel good, and when it feels good, you will be the best version of yourself. If that isn't where you are right now, then you're not where you're supposed to be, and those are, what I live my life by and I've been lucky enough that at any point in my career where I didn't feel valued, where it wasn't meshing with my purpose, I found something new to do, and I wouldn't look back on that.
Danielle Cobo
That's great advice, and thank you so much, Jenna, for joining us on our podcast today. I also want to ask where can my audience find you. Where can they find you?
Jenna Anderson
Yeah. So you can check out anything about our company at accesselitenow.com. I am on LinkedIn, Jenna Mons Anderson, so please look me up. Follow me. Connect with me. I'm always happy to connect partner with peer group’s mentor, passionate about growing everybody in the workplace, but especially women as a mother of three daughters.
Danielle Cobo
If you're out there, and you're listening, and you are in a role where you can make decisions like this, and you can say, I just really opened up my eyes to the fact that we need, we need to have a shift in our culture, and we need to provide these resources. I encourage you to reach out to access elite because they offer incredible programmes that are really designed for each of the companies that they work for, on how to support whatever the cultural needs that you have for your organization to thrive and, and create an organization where employees want to go to work doesn't feel like work. They love what they're doing, and that's what access elite gets to do.
Jenna Anderson
Wonderful. Well, Danielle, I can't thank you enough for the opportunity. I love what you do, what you're inspiring for people to kind of take that leap of faith to invest in yourself and looking forward to watching you thrive and everything you do.
Danielle Cobo
Thank you. I appreciate it. Have a good day.
