7 Tips to Building Confidence with Danielle Cobo

This episode is all about building your confidence, to attract those opportunities that you deserve! We talk all about dressing for success, starting the mornings with affirmations, acknowledging the thoughts that are not serving us, and building a growth mindset. Grab a pen and paper and tune into today's episode!

"The best investment that you can make is in yourself" - Danielle Cobo

Listen on iTunes, Spotify, and YouTube https://www.daniellecobo.com/podcast

Highlights

💫 3:10    Acknowledge the thoughts that do not serve you

💫 6:28   Starting your mornings with affirmations

💫 8:20   Celebrate all of your successes

💫 12:00   Dress for the way you want to feel

💫  16:48   Who are you surrounding yourself with?

💫  21:18   Do you have a growth mindset?


Resources:
Website: https://www.daniellecobo.com/
Newsletter: https://www.daniellecobo.com/connect
Book Recommendations: https://www.amazon.com/shop/influencer-de49157c
Career Accelerator Workbook: https://www.daniellecobo.com/career-acceleration
Crush Your Quota Workbook: https://www.daniellecobo.com/sales-performance
Amazon Store: https://www.amazon.com/shop/influencer-de49157c


Episode Resources
I AM app : https://apps.apple.com/us/app/i-am-daily-affirmations/id874656917
Amazon Best Dress Store: https://www.amazon.com/shop/influencer-de49157c


Connect with Elite Career Coach, Danielle Cobo
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/daniellecobo/
Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/TheDanielleCobo
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thedaniellecobo/
Join the “Dream Job” Facebook Community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/2826110370979215/

Lack of Confidence and Self-Doubt

How often have you experienced self-doubt? How often have you experienced times in your life where you've maybe lacked confidence? You've either compared yourself to others, saying they may be doing it better. Or you've had that negative self-talk that tells you you can't do this. Others are doing it better than you. 

Whatever it is, you're not alone. 

There have been several times in my life when I have experienced self-doubt. I lacked confidence. And one of them was when I was overcoming postpartum depression. My twins were born six weeks early. And there's an episode where I go into detail about this. But there was a time when I was really lacking confidence. I was trying to navigate through how do I be a mom and a mom of twins, while also getting back into the workforce and being an effective leader and being an influential and inspiring leader. And I lacked a lot of confidence as I was trying to navigate through that. 

And then there's been another time in my life where when my husband shared with me that he was going to be deployed. And I said, well, how am I going to do this? How am I going to be traveling overnight for work and leading a team while also raising two kids at the age of two years old? And I almost quit on myself. And then the other most recent time was starting a business and leaving that safety net of corporate and the paycheck and the company car and all the safety around that. 

And through these experiences, I have really learned the tools to transform that self-doubt and be in a place of confidence and courage. And I’m going to share that with you today. 

Seven Tips to Regaining Your Confidence and Taking That Power Within Yourself: 

1. Acknowledge the negative thoughts that are not serving you. 

   We all experienced this and even I do as well. The difference is having self-awareness. These negative thoughts are not serving us in life. And so the first step to regaining your confidence is really to acknowledge that. And I'm not saying dismiss them, because they're there. So the first step is to acknowledge them and think gosh, I am telling myself some negative things right now. 

   And what I invite you to do is ask yourself, look yourself in the mirror and as you're telling yourself these negative thoughts, imagine yourself at three years old, or even your son or your daughter across from you. Would you tell them the same things that you tell yourself? Having the self-awareness to be able to quickly say, oh, wow, I'm telling me negative thoughts. I know they're not serving me is the first step to regaining confidence. 

   So acknowledge your negative thoughts. Don't dismiss them, acknowledge them and then find ways to put the script that I can't do I can. I am I'm not perfect. While I'm striving for excellence, not perfect. Perfect doesn't exist. Perfect is perfectionism is procrastination in disguise. When you're striving for perfect, you're comparing yourself to others and you're stripping yourself of the joy of being the best version of you. 

2. Start your morning with affirmations. 

   I have a couple of resources that are available to you when it comes to affirmations. One of them is, and I'll include it in the show notes is a workbook. So whether you are in sales, and you want to crush your quota, I have a workbook that says it's a sales performance workbook. And in there, I have all these affirmations that you get to tell yourself every morning and throughout the day, to support you in transforming that negative thought and what you can't do to what you can do in sales. I also have one for career. So it's a career acceleration workbook. So if you're looking to get a new job, if you're looking to get promoted or start a business, there's affirmation specifically for that. 

   And then also, if maybe if you're in a spot where just really struggling with being present at home and at work, and you're wanting to find a balance in your life. And sometimes that starts with just the things that we tell ourselves. And I have affirmations for you for that as well. So I'm going to include in the show notes, here, some affirmations to set you up for success, whether you're looking for a job, and whether you're in sales, or you're just a working parent on the go. And you want some affirmation examples to start your day up for success. I'll include the links in, there's also a really nice app that I love, it's called I Am, it’s an app for daily affirmations, and you can set the parameters for it as well. So if your personal growth or stress and anxiety or career or wealth or positive thinking or if you're also maybe having somebody confidence where you want to regain the confidence in your body affirmations, it will be a notification and it notifies you, you can set the parameters for morning, afternoon, evening or however many times throughout the day. But it's a daily affirmation that just pops up and you can choose the ones that you want. And I love it. It's just a great way to kind of sporadically have them throughout the day for affirmation. 

   So I invite you to really start your morning with affirmations because the first hour of your days, it's the intention of the day. So starting your day with affirmations and gratitude is a great way of transforming those negative thoughts into positive thoughts. And then taking it a step further. And having affirmations that are kind of pushed to you throughout the day to really keep that positive thought in your head throughout the day. 

3. Celebrate your successes. 

   Sometimes we can get so caught up in well, I wish I had this or I thought it would be here in my career. Or I shouldn't be doing this. And sometimes we lose sight of the things that we've already accomplished and the milestones that we have unturned to get to where we're at today. And so really taking a step and looking at what is celebrate successes Can I celebrate today. And that's daily. Maybe the success was today. I normally wake up in the morning and I work out I do my 30 minutes on my peloton. Well, today I did it. And I could have easily gotten hard on myself and said, gosh, Danielle, you should have really worked out. 

   It's easy for us to get hard on ourselves on what we should think we should be doing that language of I should or I have to, but it's really about celebrating the successes of each and every day. If you're in sales, celebrate the sales that you've got from that day, whether it's that you were able to get in front of a customer that you've been wanting to get a hold of for a long time, or you did an awesome presentation where you felt like you really empowered your customer with some tools to help them be productive and efficient in their day. 

   Or whether you're in your career and you're going to celebrate the fact that if you want to get promoted, you're going to celebrate the fact that today, you took the steps in investing in your personal growth and development by reading a book or listening to a podcast or whatever it is. celebrate your successes, and to take it a step further. celebrate your successes with your peers and your managers, because they want to celebrate with you. And when you think about this, because I know sometimes people are hesitant to celebrate their successes on social media, because they don't want to come across as if they're boasting themselves. I invite you to think about something from another perspective. There are times in people's day where they're not they're feeling depressed, maybe or sad or frustrated, they're just not feeling their best selves. And sometimes seeing somebody hearing somebody else's success, maybe a struggle that they've had, and how they've overcome that might be inspiring, and might be exactly what somebody needs to see and hear that day. 

   So celebrating your successes with yourself and acknowledging them and every little success, find one thing to celebrate for that day, share it with your peers, your friends, your family, your manager, and then also take it a step further. And really kind of look at things from a different lens that if you're sharing your success, with some with on social media, is there somebody out there that really could say, oh, gosh, like, that inspires me to go off for that as well. 

4. Dress for success.

   I'm a big advocate and dressing for the way that you want to feel. Now, majority of the time, you're probably going to see me done up I like to have my makeup done, I like I love fashion. So I always dress up, but you can still there's going to be times where I'm going to be sporting, you're gonna see me on the kids soccer field, and I'm gonna be wearing tennis shoes and the ball cap. 

   But I always say like dress the way that you want to feel if you're going to be going into a meeting and you're going to be presenting in front of a big group. Put your favorite outfit on where you feel like you, you put that on, and you look in the mirror and you're like, hey, have a good, you know that that confidence, dress the way that you want to feel, dress in a way that you feel like you that you are confident. If it means putting on heels, if it means putting on doing your hair up that day, whatever it is dressed the way that you want to feel, because that's dressing the way for success. You know the difference when you're at home when you're in loungewear and you're just kind of snuggled up on the couch, there's a time and a place for that I love my husband, I call it loungewear there's always a time and a place for that where you're like you get to be comfortable and, and baggy clothes and be all snuggled up on the couch. And then there's also a time where if you're gonna be walking into a big meeting an interview or, or presenting in front of a group of people find that outfit that you feel calm, comfortable and you feel confident in that you're going to walk into. 

   And then if you are going to be presenting in front of a group, one of the things that I do to to kind of give you a quick boost of motivation is to it's called the Power Pose. It's called the Superwoman Power Pose. So you stand up with your legs kind of shoulder width apart, and you put your arms on your hips, and you stand there like a superwoman for five minutes and you just stand there with your head high. And it's one way of giving yourself your mind your body, your spirit, a quick boost of confidence. So that's another to take that dressing for success a step further, which is the power pose. We will be right back to today's episode. There is one thing you can count on in sales, and your quota will continue to increase as your business grows. 

   Sales is tough, and salespeople are constantly looking for ways to be more successful. And it's no secret that having a well-thought-out business plan is key to success in sales. But it can be hard to know where to start or how to quantify your results. Without a clear plan of action, you're likely to spin your wheels and not make much progress. To be successful, it's essential to have a process to help you focus on what's important and get measurable results. 

5. Create your tribe of women that hold you high. 

   There are people in your life where you call them and they can just be the Debbie Downer of the day, they're the person that is just negative and can just drain you emotionally throughout the day. And so those are the type of people that you're going to want to limit, you're going to really want to create more space for the people that support you, that empower you, the people that hold you high that encourage you that you have trust with that can be honest and open authentic with you when maybe there's some blind spots that you may be experiencing. But as they share with you, hey, have you thought about this, they're also gonna be the first one to pick you up, when you fall down. 

   And so really creating your tribe of women that hold you high is so essential, because it's really interesting when you look at when I was on it, I was with a conversation with somebody earlier today. And we were talking about kind of sometimes the differences between men and women and I've worked in predominantly women industries, and I've I've worked in predominantly male industries. And it's interesting, some of my observations that I found is women are often harder on other women. 

   So if we want to rise and if we want to create our seat at the table, if we want equality, then it first starts with us. It starts with us supporting each other, not comparing each other, not judging each other, not tearing each other down. It starts with us supporting and empowering each other. And so that's going to be the first step to creating equality in this world. 

6. Hold your head high. 

   This is something that I'm always speaking with, with my kids, you know, sometimes when they get down on themselves, or they're just discouraged by something, one of my boys, you just immediately looks down, and he's looking at his feet. And he's just you can just see that discouragement in him. And so one of the things I'll say is, when you look down on the ground, you miss out on the world. When you hold your head high, you see and you get to experience the world. 

   So one tip is when you're walking into a room, especially if you're new, you don't know anybody in the room that can sometimes be intimidating. And so when you're walking into a room, one of the things you do is you walk into the room and you have your eyes looking at the ceiling. And then as you're walking into the room, work your way down to make eye contact with everybody. So you're looking at their ceiling, your wall, you're walking into the room and then your eyes you're walking into the room, you're making your eyes down towards looking at every Buddy iContact. 

   It's important that again when it comes to confidence, it's your mind. And it's also how your body posture is, Are you sitting upright? Are you looking straight ahead or is your head your chin high? Because if it's not, if you're looking down at the ground, and you're not making eye contact with people, people are going to sense that, that lack of confidence that they're going to see that discouragement, very similar to, they say, if you ever run into a bear, and hopefully never run into a bear, but they say act big, fill up the space, fill up the room be bigger than you are. People want to be around confident people. 

7. Adopt a growth mindset. 

Constantly be learning, constantly be investing in yourself. The best investment that you can make is in yourself. So continuously learning, and evolving and striving for excellence and striving for the best version of yourself starts by adopting a growth mindset. And so setting aside time, each day each week, for you to really invest in yourself, fill up your cup. 

So one might be starting your morning off with an inspirational video, motivational video, a podcast, something that fills your, I would say, fill your mind, body and your soul. So fill up your, your your mind with something that is you get to learn from and then and then from there taking a step further and really applying it. So something that I do is every single day, I listen to some sort of podcast or a video or just something, you know, 1520 minutes, just kind of a quick boost of inspiration, motivation, something I get to learn from each day. And then every quarter I set aside time, specifically, at least a day for self-development, whether that's attending a seminar, whether that's attending workshops, or whatever it is, it's all about growth. It's all about self development, because it's always evolving. And so really that seventh one is adopting a growth mindset.