Discovering Alignment in Your Work: The Key to Creating Lasting Motivation with Jen Ziegner
When we're in alignment with our dreams and aspirations, creating lasting motivation is within reach. Discover how to take action towards a career that has purpose and meaning - bringing inspiration into your life for living more fully. In today's episode, hear how aligning yourself with the right values and taking action can help create a future of deep satisfaction. Motivation awaits if you're ready - so join us as we discuss what it takes!
In This Episode, You Will Learn About:
Alignment: What is it?
The signs of misalignment
Staying motivated and aligned
FREE Career Accelerator Workbook: https://bit.ly/3xXy8U
Want to work with Danielle? Schedule your call today: https://bit.ly/3OnuLLO
Let's Connect!
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MsDanielleCobo
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thedaniellecobo/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/DanielleCobo
Website: www.DanielleCobo.com
Book Recommendations: https://www.amazon.com/shop/influencer-de49157c/list/2W8I8NWS6N4CJ
About our guest:
Today's guest is Jen Ziegner. Co-creator and leadership coach of Mountain and Marathons.
Rate, Review, & Follow on Apple Podcasts
"Danielle is so Uplifting." <-- If that sounds like you, please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps me support more women -- just like you -- accelerate their careers. Click here, scroll to the bottom, tap to rate with five stars, and select “Write a Review.” Then be sure to let me know what you loved most about the episode!
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/dream-job-with-danielle-cobo/id1571797640
Also, if you haven’t done so already, follow the podcast. I’m adding a bunch of special release episodes and, if you’re not following, there’s a chance you may miss out. Follow now!
What Alignment Means in Leadership
You talk about alignment, but I'd love for you to share what alignment means to you.
Alignment for us means living in congruence with our truth. Now that for some people might also be okay, but what does that mean? We'll get a little bit more specific. Incongruence without truth, which means that first, we get clear on what actually is my vision in detail in every single area of my life. That's some of the work we do inside of the Line Leadership program, really supporting leaders to go in every area of my life.
What is my highest vision?
What do I really desire?
What do I really want?
And what's really interesting is that you might think that's the easy part, writing down what I really want, but it's not. Most of the time, this is one of the most challenging things, and we can speak more about the reasons why, but we get really clear on like what're my highest visions, my highest commitments, and what I declare. What do I stand for, who am I inspired to be, and what I'm out to create in this lifetime?
Alignment is living in congruence with that in every moment. And so then moment by moment, what it also means is that what we are thinking, what we are saying, our words, what our emotions are, and what our actions are, are in sync. Many times people, we might find ourselves in situations where we have a thought, but we say something else to please that person. Or we are feeling a certain way about something, but we're not acting on that feeling because of a whole bunch of reasons. Like why we think we can't be in alignment there. That's what causes misalignment. That causes inner resentment or just a whole bunch in turmoil or whatever it looks like for every person. And so alignment moment by moment is, it's a place like where we are in sync in every single one of those facilities.
Being in alignment is so important because of what comes when you're in alignment. There is the residual effect of having a sense of purpose and there's a direct correlation to happiness, fulfillment, and impact.
How to Get Back on Track with Alignment
It's easy to go sometimes to a place where we believe that we are in alignment, but as our life changes, our goals might change. The companies that we're working for might change, our roles and responsibilities might change, and that might kind of kilter us off of alignment. How do you know if you're off of alignment and how can we get back in alignment?
Great question. What you just said is so true. It's when we talk about our truth and living in truth, our truth is really only ever true at this moment. Some people actually struggle so much with visioning and with saying, this is where I'm going because there's a sense of, if I say this now I'm locking myself into something for the rest of my life. Which is not what this is about. I mean even if you think back, five years, did any of us imagine that this was gonna be exactly where we go, where we were gonna be, and what we'll be doing? No.
There are a couple of things. One is, the way we envision in the first place is are we actually, sometimes we say, this is exactly how I want it to be and, the role I want to have or the kind of house I want to have. But what we really encourage is to connect more with the deeper feeling. Here's how I want the place where I live to feel, here's how I wanna feel about my life in general, about my work. Here are the kinds of people I wanna be working with. I might be a CEO here, or a CEO there, or it can look different ways, but I wanna have a certain life experience and really focus on that.
Now, when people are out of alignment, what often shows up is some sense of darkness, resentment, or often resignation. When it's been there for a long time, it can be a sense of, "Yeah, but I don't even know, I feel so disconnected from my truth that I don't even know how to get back." Especially when it shows up in a range of different areas of life when it's like, "Oh, my relationship's kind of misaligned and my health is, and my job is as well." It can feel overwhelming. And this is where we come back to alignment, being a moment-by-moment choice.
What can happen is that we actually lose this connection. We don't lose it, but it's kind of our intuition, and our inner knowing moves into the background a little bit if we continuously don't listen to it. We might have gotten certain messages around like, what we actually want, what's actually good for us. And for some reason, we've made different choices because that's where what either our mom or society or whoever expects of us.
With that, the voice slowly like gets a little bit quieter. What I would recommend, I mean, if you are in this place where they really feel totally disconnected from it right now, start connecting with it when like you're choosing your clothes in the morning. What does your body actually want to wear when you're choosing your lounge? How do you actually choose your lounge? Isn't really what you want? Is it really what you desire?
Starting with these very small, seemingly insignificant little choices in the day to start reconnecting with, "Oh, I get to choose. I get to choose fully. I get to choose what I really desire." This gets us to a place where it's gonna be a little bit easier when we have a conversation with a colleague or with a boss to actually say, yes, we wanna say yes. And No, we wanna say no. It's reestablishing that connection with what's true and voicing that and being confident with that.
Those small little decisions that we make each day can have a ripple effect on the big decisions that we make in life. It's interesting that you brought up even the clothes that we choose. I will often say, how do I want to feel today? And that is gonna sometimes determine what I'm gonna wear that day. If I'm gonna be going up on stage and I'm gonna be facilitating a program or a keynote, I'm gonna be dressed to the night, I'm gonna be wearing heels, even though the majority of the time they're extremely uncomfortable.
I'm gonna be wearing a form-fitting dress that I feel confident and comfortable in. But then other days where I'm, gosh, I just really wanna feel really relaxed and just kind of at ease today. I'm probably gonna be throwing on some shorts, some flip flops, and like a loose-fitting t-shirt, hair up. But it's those little moments of how I want to feel today. And as you said, that goes into the food choices we make. Do I wanna feel clean, healthy, and lean? I may grab that green juice if I wanna feel stuffed, I kind of just want a lounge on the couch and just be in that lounge mode. It might go for a cheese pizza, whatever that is.
But it's those small moments, and as you were saying, in life our life changes moment by moment. I think you may be in our work environment, we may be in one position and we're in complete alignment. The role that we're in, the company that we work for, we're a complete alignment with the people that we work for. And then one shift could happen. Maybe that one shift is you have a new manager where maybe your values don't align. Maybe the company's gone in a different direction, maybe the products that they're focusing their time and energy on are not in alignment with what you believe in, or maybe the way the culture of the organization is changing. Or maybe there are things going on in your personal life that are changing. I love what you mentioned, which continuously looking at what is your truth and checking in and ensuring that you are in alignment every day, in every moment.
Freeing from Confusion and Focus on “What You Know”
What are some questions that we can ask ourselves to kind of check in with ourselves on a consistent basis? Am I in alignment or not?
When we dive a little bit deeper beyond the food and clothing choices. A lot of those live in conversations and relationships with other people. In communication, whether with ourselves or with other people, we ask, what's my truth? Just like, what's my truth? What's my truth? What's my truth? We are establishing that question: what do I really want?
There's another one. I see this, especially in women that often confuse themselves with "I don't know." I don't know what I want. I don't even know what's true for me. There are all these different options. Now, I'm not even sure, often confusing ourselves is a form of self-sabotage because if I remain in the place of confusion, I don't have to make a choice. When I let go of confusion, actually tap into the clarity and the truth that's there, then well, now am I gonna back it up with actual action, actual moving? And that can be scary. Tuning into is confusion being like, am I subconsciously using confusion as a self-sabotage?
When we are in a place of "I don't know", start with "What do I know." Most people tell me, I don't know what the next like career choice that I want is. I don't even know what I'm looking for in a relationship. I say BS, there are things we know. Start with things like, what do I know? What do I know? And there's always going to be pieces there about how we wanna feel about non-negotiables, about what we truly desire. Opening it up with that question, what do I know when we feel like we don't?
What do I know is a great question? And I think that sometimes we push it aside, "I don't know, I don't know," but are we also creating this space to ask ourselves what we do know? Are we creating that space to sit down without the distractions, without society's expectations, friends’ expectations, family members' expectations, or the expectations we think we should be putting on ourselves and creating this quiet space for us to ask ourselves: what do I know?
And what stories am I creating in my head and what I think I should be doing based on other people's perceptions or their expectations or what I'm observing in society? Not only what do I know, but also what do I really want? And it's not always what I want in the sense of material stuff. I think of that taking that question a step further and saying, who do I wanna be? How do I wanna feel? What type of mom, wife, coworker, leader, or spouse do I wanna be? What kind of impact do I wanna make? And then working it back from there is gonna help us get in alignment.
A hundred percent. Who we wanna be is because of all the work we do. I mean, this is the material things on top of that, they're nice, they're in cherry on top. Honestly, we have all the material things, but you are not in alignment with who you actually want to be. It's not gonna matter. Versus if we can be who we wanna be moment by moment, the material things are gonna be okay. That's beautiful. We get to enjoy that as a bonus. But it's not what it's about. That's what we're always starting with.
The “How I Want to Be” Mindset
I think of those people out there that are, whether it's a spiritual, religious space, whatever the foundation that we rely on when we focus more on, “I wanna make money or I wanna have success,” we get out of alignment with ourselves and we're doing it from a place of sometimes when it doesn't go well, we go into a scarcity mindset, go into a self-sabotaging mindset where we're hard on ourselves. Versus if we're in alignment and we're coming from “How do I wanna be? How do I wanna feel?” And we put action steps that are going to get us towards that direction. Then we're going to be in alignment. And when we're in alignment, our energy, and our purpose align with each other. Then that success comes often. It just naturally from it. Because it's where you're putting your focus.
Exactly, and that's where we bring a very different approach to goal setting than what we often see in the world, in our society right now, where it's often, okay, let's just come back to leadership and organization as an example because I believe a lot of people can relate to that. A lot of people said I'll be happy when I goals, now in the hope that when I get, let's just say the CEO title, I will feel a certain way about myself, confident, accomplished, rich, whatever. Once I get there, I'll feel a certain way. There are two big problems with that: one, often we don't actually feel that way. It's a complete assumption. And it's often actually not what this role or the shiny thing, the new car, or whatever comes with. That's number one. In the second piece, many people sacrifice their alignment on the way there. In order to get the position, I'm going to sacrifice my health, I'm going to sacrifice my romantic relationship because I think it's gonna pay off somewhere when I get somewhere. And then we get to that place, we're actually not being our best selves. We're actually not who we are inspired to be.
The way that we teach goal setting is, okay, let's get clear on who you wanna be, and then what is a goal that will call you into being that. We don't run the marathon because of the finish line, also that you can put on your resume that you run a marathon. We run the marathon because of what the training and the pursuing of that call us into being and who we become in the process. And then the thing itself is just a cherry on top, that's just a bonus. But whether it actually works out or not doesn't really matter as much. It's great, but it doesn't matter as much because every single step along the way was worth it and was in alignment. And so who we're becoming is actually what we're focusing on.
Aligning with What You Really Want
You brought up such a great point about that. I want to get to a certain level, and I see this in corporate so much because I just had a conversation with a client she calls me and we've been working on her resume and her LinkedIn and preparing her for interviews. And she's in this position where she's been offered a position. She asked me and said, "I just don't know what to do." She's in a role where she's in a leadership role. She's higher up within the organization, and she would be still high up in a leadership role, but maybe, I guess if you look at the corporate ladder, a step down in pay grade levels.
She's like, “I want to do sales, but I just feel like it is a step-down.” And I said, “Okay, take that aside, where do you feel valued, fulfilled, and happy?” When you compare the two roles right now, she's not feeling fulfilled. She is feeling undervalued at her current company. This particular company that she's received an offer for. She's talking about the leader and how amazing she is and how she really pours into the development of their team, and it's somebody she's always wanted to work for. I'm like, okay, so you now know that the person that you'd be working for is in alignment with what you want, the culture that you're looking for with this new particular role that you would have more time with your family, which is something that you've been wanting.
You know that there's potentially a long-term financial benefit, which is something that you've been talking about, being able to provide for your family. I said, so it sounds like you know the answer, but what's holding you back is this perception that you're taking a step down when in reality it sounds like you're taking a step forward in being in alignment with what is most important to you in life. And it's not that title, it's who you get to be.
What a beautiful example of how perceptions like a step-down, and step-up, how can mess with us. And then we make it, if we make it about that, it would be so easy to choose what can't take a step down. My ego and my whatever, and the perception of the company and whatever is involved in that. Well, what you've brought in there for that client is look at all the steps up you're doing. I mean, okay, and then there's this one. Does it even matter? That is such a great example.
I'll give you another one. Like one of my clients recently, I mean, she comes from a very high-level leadership position incorporates and then left those roles and was in a space of kind of like redefining what do I want? And she got this job offer and had an international consulting firm, half a million-dollar job. She was like, I wanna provide for my family, I need to provide for my family. I'm a single mom and I don't quite know what I'm doing, so this sounds like a good idea for a year or so. And I was sitting there and I know her well and I was like, okay, let's see how this goes.
I knew she had no interest in that job. I knew she actually hated the prospect of the job for so many reasons, but she was like, no, I'll think I'll do this, and I'm like, okay, let's see. It was a couple of months before she actually had to officially accept the offer and start the role. A week before, she's like, "I'm not taking the job." I'm like, "Tell me more." She's like, "Yeah, I just can't." And I had this conversation with her and I said to her, "Except for the fact that I will provide you the safety that you're looking for right now, is anything about this job exciting to you?" And she's said, "No, nothing." And I knew that because of all the work that we had done together, she would get to that point herself. But it took her to get to that point. A week before, she tells me I'm not taking the job, and I'm like, I assume.
About three or four weeks later, she started her own company. A dream something that she had been planning to do and she had ideas for four months. Shortly after getting caught and she says, "You know what? I turned on the $500,000 job, but I just said someone invests 600,000 into my company." And this is so beautiful for me to see the power of alignment and often this is one of the big, big, big pieces that hold people back from actually stepping into what's aligned. It often requires us to let go of the thing that is not. Whether that's the relationship or whether that's a job, or whether that's whatever. Often we are like, yes, but over here at least I know what I have. It's not that great. It's not exactly what I want, but you know, it's got some good things. I can justify it. I can justify holding onto this. It's like I can make this work.
If we could just go from here to the thing that we really desire, that would be great. But often it's not how it works. Now, I'm not saying that you necessarily have to leave your job and put yourself into financial insecurity or anything of that. I don't encourage that yet to get a new job, but even a relationship, like can I really find a relationship that I truly desire while I'm still in the one that I don't?
Just kind of to stay safe over here and this jumps often really scary for people because we can't see the other side and we don't know when it's gonna come, if it's gonna come, what it's gonna look like. And then we are afraid that if we let this thing go, we are gonna feel like a failure and look really stupid because now it feels like we have nothing even though that's not true. Even though we're just in this alignment and transition period, that is a big one. If any of you are in this place, I know it is something else that I want, but I know there's something I also have to let go of, we always say that alignment is simple. It's simple. The truth is simple, the heart is simple. Alignment is simple. Not always easy, but always worth it.
Being Consistent and Motivated When You Are in True Alignment
Your story of being in alignment, makes me think of that woman, it makes me think of that entrepreneurial journey of when I first left corporate and I was waffling back so much back and forth of going, well, if I know, if I go back to corporate, I will have a six-figure income, six-figure bonus checks, company car, 401K benefits, stock options.
I mean, I had a great job. A highly successful career and there was a lot of safety in there, but there was always something missing and it was a huge risk to start a business. And in the beginning stages, there would be times when people would just come up to me and, you know, I had this job, would you be interested? And I would ponder on it for a week and I would ask myself, I don't know, but that's just, it seems like a great opportunity, but I wanna do my business, but there's more safety.
It would consume me for a good week of going back and forth. And it's interesting when you truly understand what alignment means to you. You won't go back and forth internally. And this happened a week ago. I was speaking with a gentleman and he and I had worked together many, many years ago, over 10 years ago. He's starting a business and he's like, would you be interested in coming to corporate? He offered me a high role within the organization, stock options, and equity in the organization. It took me about 10 minutes to say thank you for considering me. I appreciate it, but I am so happy with what I do. Let me go ahead and refer you to two people. And I actually helped them get two employees.
When you are in true alignment, you know your truth, you know what you want, it becomes crystal clear and it helps and it makes your decision-making process faster, more efficient, more clear, concise, and in your truth at all times. How beautiful to see how from you, and I love that you mentioned these time periods, how it went from a week to 10 minutes. And this is often how it's at the beginning. I mean, it can get really hard and we get more in alignment and we actually practice and we know start noticing as you have. It was really scary to move from corporate to running your own business. And also now, it's like I'm okay.
Being in alignment actually always gives me, in the end, always gives me better results in life and what I really want and fulfillment. Now, it becomes much easier to go like, "No, I know." It's like I'm tuned into this, I'm tuned into my truth and I don't need a week anymore to make this decision because I don't have all this back and forth anymore.
It's like, this is what it is. No, thank you.
And we sometimes forget too about, you had mentioned something about maybe walking too or walking away from. We forget sometimes that yes, there is a big risk in taking a leap forward in a different direction, whether it's starting a business, going for a job, or going for a different job. Any of those two directions, whether it's in the story that I shared or the story of your client.
We also get to remember that we still have that expertise that we are leaving behind. We can always go back if we want to. It's not like I only have either forward or go back to where I was. Now obviously you always wanna stay forward minding and thinking, but we always have that to go back to. Don't discredit or lose sight of all the expertise that you've gained in what's gotten you to where you're at today.
Living Your Life Fully
Well, anything, any other advice you wanna leave for people just in being in alignment that they can just take away from all the nuggets that you've shared during our conversation?
It's a big piece in this, and I think this is really at the core. Someone, on another podcast, asked me a couple of days ago, if you had a billboard to write one message on, what would that be? And what came to me was live life fully. I do believe that the capacity to live life fully and feel all of the emotions and feel all of the rollercoaster that life can be sometimes without shying away from that. And creating ourselves to be a person who can hold that all and has the capacity to be with that all is at the core of living aligned.
If we can do that and we don't shy away from the possibility of sadness, or disappointment, but simply can see that this is another delicious part of our human experience and what we've come here to do, where we don't need to chase bliss and joy every day, but really like acknowledge that the human experience in our capacity to experience more of the beautiful, comfortable emotions comes at the same time as opening ourselves up to more of the other side that might be more difficult to deal with. They come together and so really like creating that capacity and that okayness with everything that life offers gives us such deeper access to living in alignment because then it's like nothing can go wrong.
Then as long as I live in alignment, as long as I choose my truth, nothing can go wrong because I can handle it all.
